Nancy, the accepted child of God

*big sigh* Okay. I'm writing. For me. For an audience of one.

For the last  two to three years I have been on a 'get healthy' journey. This has included my eating, exercising, and devotional life. Or physical, emotional, and spiritual. Whatever. It's been about getting me whole and healthy. And trim. And hot. Comfortable in my own skin.

A few weeks ago I started going through the book Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeust with some gals around town. Super encouraging for sure. This week for homework we got into chapter. Oh my! This chapter spoke to my longing heart. It encouraged me, and restored my vision. Like many good God books, it included a list of the ways he loves us. Feeling the love, and longing for more, I decided to dig a little deeper. That's really how I finally ended up here. I wasn't going to be satisfied with just a trite little phrase. Seeing with my own eyes what the Bible truly said was going to encourage me more. Or so I believed...

Nancy, the accepted child of God. Of course the verse reference was tagged behind it, (I Corinthians 1:2). Not enough for this Jesus girl! No way. I got my holy spirit pants on and looked it up in my Bible. And this is what I get, 'To the church of God that is in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus, called to be saints together with all those in every place call upon the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, both their Lord and ours.'

Hmmm... nice verse. It really is. It could, or does speak to me. But seriously, 'accepted?' I don't see the connection. I see 'sanctified,' or set apart for him. I even see 'unified,' through reference of the 'saints together,' be it far or wide. I don't see the author speaking to individuals, but to the church as a whole. God knows! I need to see his heart of love and acceptance of the church as a whole!

Obviously, I am a tad bit irritated at this use of scripture. It's bologna sandwiches in my book for how it's used. But I'm not to be deterred. Maybe another version? ... No. I don't get her decision for the use of this verse. I think it's cheating. Yet, I will learn from it. I will accept it as a choice morsel for me to consume. The church is his people. Sanctified and holy, those who call on the name of Jesus as Lord. He loves those people. Therefore, they are accepted.

Side note: Romans 15:7 seems way more appropriate! 'Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.' Acceptance appears to be related to obedience to holiness, and belief in Jesus Christ.

And... BAM! Here it is! I 'accidentally?' ended up in Romans 12, thinking I was in 15. Now to study.

Reading a Good Book

I love to read. In fact I need to read more. Sometimes, if I don't have a book in front of me, I forget to read. It's then that I wonder around, get online, waste time... A good book by the side of my bed really should be mandatory.

Unfortunately, I often practice a lack of self control and periodically go book crazy if it's been too long into between novels. Then I loose all control and read for hours. And hours. Staying up for 'just a little longer,' turns into a time warp. All track of time is lost. Gone. Then suddenly it's two or three a.m. Good news is I'm done with my book. The bad news is it's three a.m! Seriously! What the what? What was I thinking? I'm going to be exhausted, potentially crabby... Well, crabby for sure. I just have to make the decision at three a.m. to be nice and patient with my family in a few short hours.

There is so much I love about a good book. I love getting to know the characters. I love seeing them grow and change. And sometimes, in a weird way, I thrive on being irritated with a character I don't like or can't relate to at all. I love rich vocabulary, (like precipice) and amazing detail (Heidi is amazing when it comes to detail! I've been tempted to give up all and live in the Alps with the goats after a little time with Heidi and her grandfather.

If a book is really amazing it will challenge me; maybe change me or cause me to have a new perspective on things in life. As much as I despise romance books every once in a while there is a book with just a touch of love and faithfulness so that the time I'm done I'm thankful for you. I'm thankful for our vows. Thankful you are who you are. Thankful even for all the ways you irritate me. Thankful for our life together and our own story. And that's really what I wanted to tell you in my little spill about loving books.

And I'll take an Iced Latte please...

Okay, I said I wanted to try writing you letters. So I'm going to try this method. Sometimes I may pick a random topic related to me or us and just write about my thoughts and feelings for said topic.

 So for starters, I think I'll pick...

 COFFE...

 I don't love coffee. I think it taste bitter and I 99% of the time I cannot relate to people when they say 'I can't function without coffee.' Multiple cups of coffee a day is like saying, 'hmmm... I think I'd like to be sick. What can I do to deprive myself of sleep, and feel shaky and nauseas all at once? I know, I'll drink a cup of coffee! If I drink it black it'll taste like burnt crap!'

 But I do occasionally like and enjoy drinking a cup of cream and sugar-laced coffee. It's the experience. The joy of sitting with someone I care about and sipping away on a strong flavored drink can be compared to watching fireworks, or floating down the river. These experiences are fine and wonderful by themselves, but they become something memorable end wonderful when they are with someone else.

 When I choose to have a drink of coffee it's my way of saying 'this moment is going to be something more than mundane, possibly even exciting!' A warm drink makes me feel cozy. Drinks on ice are invigorating and exciting. Meaning I get invigorated and excited. Sometimes a really good drink (like a Dutch Bros Kahlua Kicker), in the right environment can even be a bit aphrodisiac-like. For example, going on a car ride, or heading over to friends... It sets a mood before anything happens. I don't love coffee, it's not my air. I wouldn't want one every day. But sometimes I love the experience and company that comes come with a really good latte or other (de)caffeinated drink!

 *please make note: aphrodisiac-like response to an iced latte is not the same as a sugar rush! I'll explain those another topic when I discuss s'mores and making memories.

 RECAP... In case of any confusion I'm going to risk it here and write a bit more to make sure everything is spelled out clear... Occasionally I like to drink coffee with you. Why? When it's with you, it's because I'm in love. It's because I actually do like a wee bit of romance. You love coffee. So when I drink coffee with you I'm taking in something you love - even it's just another hot drink to you. There are drinks I really do like. And when I drink them there's always a flood of good memories associated with them. (Even if I'm alone running errands I'll only get the 'feel-really-good-memory-make' drinks.) Friendliness. Kindness. Love. Maybe that's where the tingly excitement that's near sexual comes from. 

So when you occasionally buy me a drink and I say 'thank you;' truthfully I haven't said the fullness of what it means to me. And also I guess why it stings a bit when you buy a drink for others and not me, if I'm going to be honest here, although I never made the connection until now. When I say 'thank you,' this is what I mean: Thank you for thinking of me, for letting me share something YOU love, for letting me feel excited and giddy even, and for letting me feel completely loved by you, and for letting me love and appreciate you more.